Dating in Dayton: I spent 2 weeks on Bumble and here's what happened

In a moment of curiosity a couple of weeks ago, I downloaded the dating app Bumble in the wee hours of the morning on my phone.

So over Tinder
A coworker had suggested the app as an alternative to Tinder, because the power of connection in Bumble is up to the women. That's right -- in this app, the woman makes the first point of contact after a match is established, whereas in other apps once you're paired up, anything is fair game.

As a single parent having recently moved to a totally different part of the Miami Valley while also changing workplaces post-divorce, I definitely flouder a bit as it comes to meeting new people, so a dating app seemed like the logical way to ease back into a scene I haven't been in since the beginning of my 20's.

How does it work?
On Bumble, you swipe right on a potential match, and if postitively paired up, the woman has 24 hours to initate contact.

This felt like a whole new obstacle for me, as I'm actually pretty passive when it comes to expressing interest in a potential partner -- I appreciate being the person worthy of the pursuit. It took me a couple of tries to come up with a solid opener that was a genuine question I'd like to have answered, and a pretty good indicator if any match had any futher potential.

Not for me
I spent two weeks on the app before I decided I'd rather meet people the old fashioned way, even if that feels closer-to-impossible at this point in my life.

It isn't that I didn't have a good amount of matches -- I did. But the majority of them fizzled after just a message or two.

I learned quickly that being a single mom certainly carries a good amount of stigma around it -- more than one person stopped responding to me altogether once I mentioned I have littles. Other people had unsavory past experiences with single moms (or their exes) and therefore weren't open to giving it another go.

Some things never change
I only ended up really talking to two people, and meeting one. After that, I realized that not a whole lot has changed in the dating scene -- there's just newer ways to go through the same old patterns.

So now I'm back to being off the dating app market, instead investing my time in hanging out with my kids, my pets, my friends, and myself. I'll just continue to quietly be open to the unexpected -- even if that ends up being on my own.

Have a suggestion on a Dating in Dayton feature, or new dating technology we should check out? Email this reporter:

About the Author