D.L. Stewart: TGIF! Or maybe it’s Tuesday, or Saturday, or …

It's difficult to remember what day of the week it is.
It's difficult to remember what day of the week it is.

These are uncertain times for everyone. Medical experts aren’t sure when the pandemic will end. Wall Street analysts don’t know how low the Dow might go. No one can say when pleasures such as sports, dining out and concerts will be available again.

My biggest question is what day of the week it is.

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In the pre-quarantining days I had a fairly firm grasp on identifying what day it was, because each one had a specific purpose. Mondays and Fridays were for my tennis group. Tuesdays, Thursdays and Saturdays were for going to the gym. Wednesdays were for writing and filing my column. And it was easy to recognize Sunday, because that was the day I had nothing specific to do.

But now Monday might be Thursday and Wednesday could be Saturday and they all meld together in a haze of purposeless ennui, because every day is the day there’s nothing to do that we didn’t do yesterday.

Tuesday’s the only exception. On Tuesdays I get an automatic alert from my smart phone’s calendar reminding me to take the trash out to the curb that evening, because it gets picked up on Wednesday morning. I’m not saying taking out the trash is the highlight of my week, although at least it does give me something to look forward to.

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But my wife and I start the other six days asking each other, “So, what are you going to do today?” And then we laugh, because we know we’re going to do exactly the same things we’ve done every other day since this whole mess began.

We’ll sleep late, eat breakfast and read the newspaper. By that time it will be close to noon and my wife will get on the phone to check with our friends, most of whom have just finished sleeping late, eating breakfast and reading the newspaper.

Meanwhile, I’ll return to the newspaper and tackle the Jumble, Sudoku and crossword puzzle in that order. Although sometimes I’ll tackle the crossword puzzle, Sudoku and Jumble in that order, just go keep from falling into a rut.

I probably should take advantage of the free time I have in the afternoons by going online and learning to crochet or speak French or something. But by then I’m tuckered out by all that newspaper activity, so I take a nap. After my nap it’s time to make dinner, eat dinner, watch television and go to bed to rest up for another hectic day.

To be sure, all that monotony is a small price to pay if it helps bring this pandemic to an end.

I just hope that happens before I have trouble remembering what month it is.