If ads for Father’s Day gifts could be converted into a picture of the typical American dad, that picture would look something like this: He’d be a funny T-shirt-wearing, beer-swilling, tool-using, fisherman, camping kayaker who grills every meal after constructing the table he eats it on. Next to the table would rest a pair of $95 running shoes.
He’d have a desk full of paperweights with photos of his smiling children – some of the photos etched into the glass – a leather-bound portfolio embossed with his initials, a pen in the shape of a .50-caliber bullet, and a plaque that anoints him the world’s greatest pop.
So, as not to disappoint, here’s the proof – a list of gifts to help satisfy the guy you love to call dad. Remember, Father’s Day is this Sunday, June 17.
- Personalized pint set, the ammo can version: The ammo can includes two laser-etched pint glasses and a personalized .50-caliber bottle opener. Dad also gets a couple of beef sticks. It costs $69.99
- Lew’s Laser TXS Baitcast combo: Is your dad all about the bass? Then get him a graphite rod and reel for hours of casting fun. It’s $59.99. You can get a free Lew’s cap with purchase.
- Craftsman mechanic tool sets: A variety of sets are available starting at $49.98. You can give him a list of all the things you need to have fixed in the Father’s Day card.
- Fabric hammock with stand: If dad can get those kids off his lawn, he can enjoy a summer of relaxing yard naps for $198.
- Heritage Tours: If your dad is the wandering type, give him a destination and send him on his way. Heritage Tours offers excursions to exotic locales. Prices vary.
- A “greatest dad” cap from LIDS: Let everyone know your dad is the greatest by having it stitched on a cap for him. Or, you can have other things stitched on a cap -- your choice.
- Bellroy leather note sleeve wallet: Dad will love the look of leather in this slim wallet. It’s $89.95; available at Amazon. Remember, you can join Amazon Prime for free for a limited trial and get free two-day shipping on many items.
- Filippo Loreti Venice moonphase gold watch: Dad deserves a gold watch for all he puts up with. You can get him this one for $249.
- Omaha Steaks n' Burgers gift box: Dad’s a griller at heart, so how about a box of steak and burgers? It’s $59.99. Maybe he’ll invite you over for dinner.
- MLB Shop custom men's jersey: So dad’s a Yankees fan? Even if you go for the Sox, think about how big his smile will be when he opens that jersey with his name and Derek Jeter’s number on it. It’s $124.99 from the official MLB Shop.
- Fanchest gift boxes: Regular and “baby boxes” of your dad’s team’s sports stuff starts at $59. They also have memorabilia boxes starting at $130 (that include signed or game-used merchandise from a choice of players.) Father's Day boxes begin at $59.
- Allbirds wool runner shoes: Wool sneakers you can toss in the wash are all the rage this year. You can snag a pair for dad for $95. They come in eight colors.
- The Amazon Echo Spot: You know dad wants one if only to ask it “how’s the weather” seven times a day. It’s $129.99.
- Arccos 360 golf tracking system: For the dad who sees himself as the next Tiger Woods, a performance tracking system. It costs $214.93.
- The Art of Shaving beard maintenance set: If your dad is a little shaggy, beardwise, here’s a pretty swell gift. It’s $60.
- Yeti Rambler 30 oz. tumbler: Seriously, you haven’t gotten your dad one of these yeti? It’s $34.99.
- The Good Hurt Fuego Hot Sauces sampler pack: Does your dad put hot sauce on everything? Give him a sampler pack so he can refine his ability to eat things as hot as the sun. It’s $34.99.
- Mott & Bow Wooster stretch jeans: Maybe your dad is a fashion plate. A pair of Mott & Bow jeans could be the perfect gift. They are $118 a pair. Oh, and they stretch. You’re welcome, Dad.
- MeUndies men's boxer brief 10-pack: OK, this company claims its undies are three times as soft as cotton. Get a 10-pack of boxer briefs for $150.
- Amazon Kindle Paperwhite: Is your dad a reader? Get him a Kindle Paperwhite so he can read the latest John Grisham novel.
- Happy Socks The Beatles collector box set: Ever wished you could live in a yellow submarine? Your dad probably does right now, if just for five minutes of peace and quiet. At least let his feet have the chance. The collector box set costs $84.
- Leatherology money clip: It’s a full-grain leather clip that can hold up to 20 bills. But let’s face it, if your dad still has 20 bills in his pocket, you are clearly not doing your job as an offspring. The clip cost $25.
- Grafomap custom map poster: This website allows you to create a map poster of any place in the world. Map out dad’s hometown, the city where he had his first job or where he met mom. The maps start at $49.
- Fandango gift card: Does your dad love a good movie? Then give him the gift of one with a gift card from Fandango. Of course, he’s on his own for popcorn.
- Ancestry DNA kit: Is dad really who he says he is? One way to find out: order a DNA kit. The results will prove if dad is indeed a Viking as he has claimed for so many years. An Ancestry DNA kit costs $69 through June 18.